I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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