I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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