i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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