The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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