she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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