Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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