If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
