You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
