I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
