You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
