But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Randomize
