Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
