I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize