Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize
