They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
