We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Let's get the cat blown out
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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