All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Even my vagina gasped.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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