She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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