end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Where did you get a picture of my penis
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
