rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
