I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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