Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Don't tell me you're on acid again
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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