Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize