Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
