Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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