It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize