Small penises have feelings too.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize