i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
