I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Someone signed my nipple.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
