So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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