Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
