oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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