i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
