What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I came so hard my ears popped.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
