im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
