i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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