Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Randomize