I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Randomize