FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
