PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize