In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
