who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My underwear smells like fireworks.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize