youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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