Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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