I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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