Its about making memories worth repressing
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
be right there i have to get my cape
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
