whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
