love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
