Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
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