guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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