Why are handjobs necessary in class?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
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