im drinking this country out of the recession.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
