He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize